Much to the delight of fans of the ’90s cult movie BASEketball, Fortitude Valley watering hole The Brightside is now taking applications for the very first Brisbane league devoted to this formerly fictional game.
A hybrid of Baseball and Basketball, BASEketball is a made-up sport (aren’t they all?) from the film of the same name, created by South Park’s Trey Parker and Matt Stone.
The movie plot follows two unemployed friends, who — following a drunken competition with some successful former classmates — create an entirely new sport based on the rules of Baseball and Basketball.
Rule variations for BASEketball include shots made from different locations that count as singles, doubles, triples and home runs, and any missed shots constitute an out.
Also permitted in the game are “psyche outs”, where a contender can say or do whatever it takes to cause the offense to lose concentration and miss their shot.
The Brightside have promised to the public a 100% legit, 4-a-side, free-to-play competition that will be inside and air-conditioned, with a functioning bar run every Saturday. In keeping with the film’s soundtrack, the venue has guaranteed that “bulk Reel Big Fish” will be on repeat throughout the competition.
We trust that the rules of the National BASEketball League (NBL) will apply to prevent this magical game from becoming just another cesspool of corporate greed. This means that teams cannot switch cities, no player trade-offs, and individuals are not permitted to take money through corporate sponsorship deals.
So if you’re not particularly athletic and have extremely good chat, BASEketball is the game for you! Hit up email@example.com to register your team, but get in quick — the teams are almost full already.